Are you humorous? Like a clown? Do you amuse me? Are you right here for my leisure? Let’s face it, being humorous is among the most deceptively exhausting issues to do on command. There’s a science to comedy. It’s mathematical, its calculated, it requires precision and pinpoint timing. Farts are additionally humorous. However within the case you end up too bashful to interrupt wind within the audition room we now have compiled a number of lists of comedic monologues for boys to follow on.
Nice comedic monologues for males aren’t that arduous to come back by, however they are often troublesome to execute appropriately. When auditioning for a comedic position, it’s essential that you simply select a monologue that may assist your character shine via whereas permitting you to come back throughout because the characters fully.
On this article, we now have nice comedic monologues for males from many fantastic performs. We’ll additionally discover 10 hilarious male monologues from motion pictures that showcase comedic expertise. Whether or not you’re an aspiring actor or just looking for some side-splitting leisure, these monologues are certain to hit the mark. So, with out additional ado, let’s dive into the world of comedic monologues for males and discover the proper piece to depart your viewers in stitches
Comedic Monologues For Males
1. Tartuffe By Moliere
TARTUFFE: A love of heavenly magnificence doesn’t preclude
A correct love for earthly pulchritude;
Our senses are fairly rightly captivated
By excellent works our Maker has created.
Some glory clings to all that Heaven has made;
In you, all Heaven’s marvels are displayed.
On that truthful face, such beauties have been lavished,
The eyes are dazzled and the center is ravished;
How might I look on you, O flawless creature,
And never adore the Creator of all Nature,
Feeling a love each passionate and pure
For you, his triumph of self-portraiture?
At first, I trembled lest that love needs to be
A refined snare that Hell had laid for me;
I vowed to flee the sight of you, eschewing
A rapture that may show my soul’s undoing;
However quickly, truthful being, I grew to become conscious
That my deep ardour might be made to sq.
With rectitude, and with my bounden obligation.
I thereupon surrendered to your magnificence.
It’s, I do know, presumptuous on my half
To carry you this poor providing of my coronary heart,
And it’s not my advantage, Heaven is aware of,
However your compassion on which my hopes repose.
You’re my peace, my solace, my salvation;
On you relies upon my bliss – or desolation;
I bide your judgment and, as you assume finest,
I shall be both depressing or blest.
Age: 20s 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
2. Fats Pig By Neil Lubute
TOM: I’m weak. That’s what I mainly discovered from our time collectively. I’m a weak particular person, and I don’t know if I can overcome that. No, possibly I do know. Yeah. I do know that I’m, and I can’t… overcome it, I imply. I believe you might be a tremendous lady, I actually do. And I actually love what we’ve had right here. Our time collectively… However I believe that we’re very totally different folks. Not simply who we are- jobs or that sort of thing- nevertheless it does play into it as properly. Components in. We most likely ought to’ve realized this earlier, however I’ve been so glad being close to you that I simply sorta ignored it and went on. I did. However I really feel it developing now, increasingly, and I simply think- No, that’s bullshit, really, the entire work factor.
Age: 20s 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
3. The Significance of Being Earnest By Oscar Wilde
ALGERNON: I haven’t the smallest intention of eating with Aunt Augusta. To start with, I dined thereon Monday, and as soon as every week is kind of sufficient to dine with one’s personal relations. In thesecond place, at any time when I do dine there I’m all the time handled as a member of the household,and despatched down with both no lady in any respect, or two. Within the third place, I do know perfectlywell whom she’s going to place me subsequent to, to-night. She’s going to place me subsequent Mary Farquhar,who all the time flirts along with her personal husband throughout the dinner-table. That’s not very nice. Certainly, it’s not even respectable . . . and that form of factor is enormously on the rise. The quantity of ladies in London who flirt with their very own husbands is completely scandalous. It appears to be like so dangerous. It’s merely washing one’s clear linen in public.
Age: 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: Sure
4. Leo Bloom from “The Producers” – I Would Wish to Say One thing
Monologue: “I want to say one thing your honor, not on my behalf, however in reference to my associate, Mr. Bialystock….your honor, women and gents of the jury, Max Bialystock is probably the most egocentric man I ever met in my life…Not solely is he liar, and a cheat and a scoundrel, and a criminal, who has taken cash from little outdated women, he has additionally talked folks into doing issues, particularly me, that they’d by no means in a thousand years had dreamed of doing. However, your honor, as I perceive it the legislation was created to guard folks from being wronged. Your honor, whom has Max Bialystock wronged? I imply, whom has he actually harm? Not me. Not me. I used to be…. this man…. nobody ever referred to as me Leo earlier than. I imply, I do know it’s not an enormous authorized level, however even in kindergarten they used to name me Bloom. I by no means sang a music earlier than. I imply with another person, I by no means sang a music with another person earlier than. This man…. this man… it is a fantastic man. He made me what I’m in the present day…he did. And what of the expensive women? What would their lives have been with out Max Bialystock? Max Bialystock, who made them really feel younger, and engaging, and wished once more. That’s all I’ve to say.”
Age: 20s 30s 40s 50s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs and Motion pictures
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
5. The Cherry Orchard BY Anton Chekov
TROFIMOV: All Russia is our orchard. The land is nice and exquisite, there are various marvellous locations in it. (Pause) Assume, Anya, your grandfather, your great-grandfather, and all of your ancestors have been serf-owners, they owned residing souls; and now, doesn’t one thing human take a look at you from each cherry within the orchard, each leaf and each stalk? Don’t you hear voices…? Oh, it’s terrible, your orchard is horrible; and when within the night or at evening you stroll via the orchard, then the outdated bark on the timber sheds a dim mild and the outdated cherry-trees appear to be dreaming of all that was 100, 2 hundred years in the past, and are oppressed by their heavy visions. Nonetheless, at any price, we’ve left these 2 hundred years behind us. Up to now we’ve gained nothing in any respect—we don’t but know what the previous is to be to us—we solely philosophize, we complain that we’re uninteresting, or we drink vodka. For it’s so clear that with a purpose to start to stay within the current we should first redeem the previous, and that may solely be executed by struggling, by strenuous, uninterrupted labour. Perceive that, Anya.
Age: 50s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: Sure
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6. The Ebook of Mormon by Matt Stone, Robert Lopez, and Trey Parker
ELDER PRICE: Effectively, properly… If it isn’t the SUPER MORMON. Spreading “the phrase”?! Making extra – BRAIN WASHED ZOMBIES?! How is it YOU transformed all these folks into Mormons! You get every part you pray for. YOU’RE doing every part I used to be alleged to do. Doesn’t that appear somewhat telling to you?! The universe doesn’t work the way in which we have been advised! After I was 9 years outdated… My household took a visit to Orlando, Florida. It was probably the most fantastic, most magical place I had ever seen. I mentioned to myself “THIS is the place I need to spend eternity!” My mother and father advised me that if I made God proud, and did regardless of the church requested, within the Latter Days I might have no matter I wished. So I WORKED and I WORKED. And even once I studied Mormon tales and I believed, ‘That doesn’t make ANY SENSE’, I KEPT WORKING as a result of I used to be advised ONE DAY — I might get my reward!! Planet Orlando! However what do I’ve now? I can’t even get a ticket residence…
Age: 20s 30s Teenagers
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs Musicals
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
Obtain This Monologue Right here
7. THE RETURN BY Reg Cribb
STEVE: No, no, no… ya can’t flip again now. I’m startin’ to see you because the voice of a really misunderstood part of our society. However you recognize… there’s one million of me getting’ spherical, mate. They usually’ll all inform ya they’d a powerful life. You realize, crushed up by their dad, in bother with the cops, pisshead mum, tough college. 1,000,000 fuckin’ excuses why they turned out to be dangerous eggs.
And I received all the above… Oh yeah! Fact is, most of ―em are simply bored. They depart their shit-ass state college and stay on the dole of their diddly bumfuck nowhere suburb. Earlier than ya realize it, ya received some lady up the duff and no cash. She spends the day with a screamin’ sprog and a fag in her mouth plonked in entrance of a daytime cleaning soap wearin her tracky daks all day, dreamin’ of bein’ swept away by some Fabio and she or he simply will get… fatter. However… her Centrelink funds have gone up and all her fats mates are waitin’ in line behind her!
It’s a profession transfer for ―em. Gettin up the duff. And also you… drink with ya mates, watch the footy and the spotlight of the week is the native tavern has a skimpy barmaid each Friday. And ya know the remainder of the world is havin a greater time. Ya simply realize it. The magazines are tellin’ ya that, the newspapers, the telly.
Everyone’s richer, everyone’s extra stunning, and everyone’s received extra… function. And ya thinkin’, how do I make sense of this dog-ass life? After which someday ya simply pay money for a gun. Ya don’t even know what ya gonna do with it. It’s just like the sound of a V8 within the distance. It takes ya… some other place. [Pause.] I didn’t see ya writin’ any of this down. I’m spillin’ my guts out within the title of artwork and also you don’t give a shit. What kind of author are ya?
Age: 20s 30s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
Obtain This Monologue Right here
8. SECRET BRIDESMAIDS BUSINESS BY Elizabeth Coleman
JAMES: Look, intercourse and love are separate issues…Effectively, they are often, that’s all I’m saying. This factor with Naomi- okay, it ought to by no means have happened-but it didn’t must affect on what I’ve with Meg. I believed that was the deal. It was a separate association. She advised me she simply wished a little bit of enjoyable, and now she turns round and does this…! I imply, the place the hell did that come from? If I’d recognized Naomi felt like that I might’ve damaged it off along with her months in the past. Effectively possibly. Oh shit, possibly not. However I just-I simply want girls would say what they imply. You realize-plainly, clearly state what they need as an alternative of anticipating you to be psychic. Meg purchased me this T-shirt on the Warner Brothers retailer, and it’s received an image of Superman on it. He’s carrying this perplexed expression and he’s saying You need me to leap tall buildings and be delicate and supportive?! That’s how it’s with girls. They need you to slay a dragon for them one second, then cry at a information canine industrial the subsequent.
And one way or the other you’re anticipated to guess when they need you to be controlling and when they need you to be crying-and in case you don’t make the precise guess on the proper time it’s immediately construed as proof that you simply don’t love them sufficient. Should you actually cherished me you wouldn’t must ask. What number of occasions have I heard that? Effectively I’m sorry, I’ve cherished a number of folks so much, however no-one’s ever stepped out of the shadows and handed me a crystal ball. Anyway, I do know I’m making an attempt to alter the topic. The actual fact is, I’ve been appearing like a prick.
Age: 20s 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
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9. COSI By Louis Nowra
DOUG: It was the fault of the psychiatrist. I’d been seeing him due to my pyromania-that’s an individual who likes lighting fires-but you most likely know that being College educated. You realize the issue with pyromania? It’s the one crime the place it’s important to be on the scene of it to make it an ideal crime, to present your self satisfaction. “Course, meaning the possibilities of you getting caught are larger, particularly in case you’re standing in entrance of the fireplace, face stuffed with ecstasy and with a big exhausting on. So, the cops received me and I’m despatched to the shrink. He tells me that I’ve received an unresolved drawback with my mom. I believe, hi there, he’s not going to inform me to do one thing Oedipal, like fuck her or one thing…however that wasn’t the issue. My ego had taken a extreme battering from her. He mentioned I had higher resolve it, cease treating her like I used to be nonetheless a baby. It made some form of cosmic sense. I needed to stand as much as her. So I thought of it and realized that I needed to deal with it like a boxing match, get the primary punch in, so to talk, to present me the higher hand in our relationship. She had 5 cats.
One evening I rounded them up, put them in a cage, doused them with petrol and put a match to them. Effectively, boy, oh, boy, what a racket! They have been operating across the yard burning and howling-there’s no such factor as grace underneath strain for a burning cat, let me inform you. I hid within the shrubs when Mum got here outdoors to see what was occurring. Completely freaked out, she did. 5 of them, operating across the yard like cell bonfires. I figured I’d wait a few hours until the cats have been lifeless and mum was feeling a bit sorry for herself and I’d knock on the entrance door and say to her ‘Hello, mum, I’ve come to speak about our unresolved conflicts’ however, oh, no, a type of cats bumped into the home. In a few minutes the entire bloody home was alight and inside half an hour there was no bloody entrance door to knock on. (a beat) If it wasn’t for that rattling cat, I wouldn’t be right here.
Age: 20s 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
Obtain This Monologue Right here
10. THE DAYS & NIGHTS OF BEEBEE FENSTERMAKER By: William Snyder
BOB: My title is Bob Smith, care of Claude and Esther Berry Smith, Field 231, Hughes, Arkansas. I’m twenty-five years outdated and I’ve an eighth grade training. My daddy run me clear out of city. Purchased me a a method ticket on a Trailways Bus. Advised me he’d purchase me a a method ticket to anyplace in the usA. Even rode with me so far as Le-Hello. (Pronounced Lee-Excessive) to ensure I didn’t pull a quick one and slip again after sunset. He mentioned Hughes wasn’t large enough for the each of us. Hughes is tee-ninecy all proper. However I didn’t assume it was that small. Final I seen of my Daddy was when the bus puled into Le-Hello. he received off the bus and purchased me a Dr. Pepper and this comedian ebook. (pulls a comic book ebook from hip pocket) He mentioned, “Effectively, so lengthy, Bob. I’ll see you within the humorous papers.” Earlier than I might even say something he skipped throughout the freeway and was thumbin a experience again to Hughes. That was the final I seen of my daddy. The final I seen of him earlier than he took off for Hughes. I guess he was again there earlier than supper. I do know he’s again there by now.
(Pleasantly, He appears to be like on the kitchen desk) I’m wondering what Momma and Daddy had for supper? Fried hen most definitely. I certain do love pal hen.
I certain do miss Hughes. I by no means been no additional than Blackfish Lake cept the time Momma and Daddy took me as much as hear Reverend Moore Preach a revival at Proctor. Momma’s a bug on faith, however outdated Reverend Moore’s one someone certain igged her. Reverend Moores the shoutin foot stompin sort of faith, and Momma’s is the toe the road, hoe the row sort. They don’t even sing in Momma’s church. It was began up proper there in Hughes by Reverend Bitsie Trotter. He does odd jobs with a pick-up truck throughout the week. Of us mentioned the explanation he didn’t permit singing was trigger he couldn’t carry a tune.
Age: 20s 30s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: No
Obtain This Monologue right here
11. Black Stache from “Peter and the Starcatcher” – Maybe You Assume
Monologue: “Perchance you assume a treasure trunk sans treasure has put my piratical BVDs in a twist? How incorrect you might be. Sure, I’d hoped to be hip-deep in diamonds, however they’re a poor substitute for what I actually crave: a bona fide hero to assist me really feel complete. For and not using a hero, what am I? Half a villain; a pirate partially; ruthless, however toothless. After which I noticed you, and I believed, “Possibly? Can it’s? Is he the one I’ve waited for? Would he, for instance, surrender one thing valuable for the sake of the daughter he loves?” However alas, he offers up sand. Now, let’s see: hero with treasure, excellent. Hero with no treasure…. doable. No hero and a trunk full o’ sand? Not s’a lot. NOW, WHERE’S MY TREASURE?!?”
Age: 20s 30s 40s
Gender: Male
From: Monologues From Performs Motion pictures
Kind: Comedy
One minute monologue: Sure
Obtain This Monologue Right here
Listed below are a number of hilarious male monologues from motion pictures that showcase comedic expertise:
“Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” (1986)
Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick): Ferris’ opening monologue explaining his philosophy on life and take a day without work from college.
“Annie Corridor” (1977) Alvy Singer (Woody Allen):
Alvy’s opening monologue discussing his views on life, love, and relationships.
“Dr. Strangelove” (1964)
President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers): The President’s absurd telephone name with the Soviet Premier, making an attempt to elucidate the unintended deployment of a nuclear bomb.
“The Hangover” (2009)
In conclusion, comedic monologues for males supply a novel alternative for actors to showcase their expertise and depart audiences in matches of laughter. From traditional performs to trendy masterpieces, we’ve coated 20 of probably the most hilarious monologues within the comedy style. Keep in mind, the important thing to a profitable efficiency is to pick out a monologue that resonates with you and your viewers, and ensure to do your analysis and follow, follow, follow! Preserve these comedic gems in thoughts, and also you’re certain to carry the home down each time